Winter Solstice

A Candle in the Darkness. The quote following came from within an email that arrived in my inbox this morning from Fortuny, Venice. Fortuny is a textile company that I have appreciated for several decades, though I have yet to travel to Venice to visit its atelier. Someday I will. In the meantime, I have acquired several remnants of Fortuny’s exquisite silk textiles over the past 20 years. Pillows await.

There is an old saying [which actually was coined in the 1960s], “It is better to light a candle than to curse the darkness.” As we mark the winter solstice and the shortest day of the year in the northern hemisphere, this sentiment resonates especially deeply, drawing us more meaningfully towards the symbolism of light. We often ask ourselves what our role is as artists and creators. There is an inherent curiosity to the act of creation, a never-ending search in pursuit of beauty, truth, and light. We follow that light, measure it, and on our best days, we capture and reflect it. In our search, we illuminate hidden elements of our humanity, shining a light on the good, the bad, and everything in between, to discover the beauty that lies within all things. Our gift is to seek the light in all its forms and to share it, especially when the world feels shrouded in shadow. The solstice is a reminder that even in the deepest darkness, light is simply waiting, ready to return. At times, we may be called upon to guide or summon it. Other times, we need to create it. For centuries, artists, poets, and philosophers have drawn inspiration from this cycle of light and dark that mirrors the struggles, triumphs, and the resilient hope of the human experience. Just as the sun will begin to linger longer in the sky each day after the solstice, so too can we find the courage to persist in our creative pursuits, even when inspiration feels dim. As creators, we do more than reflect light; we help transform and shape it. A photographer captures the play between shadow and sun, while a painter interprets its gradients and hues. Poets and musicians evoke its warmth and symbolism through words and tone, while architects and designers manipulate space and transform environments to collaborate with light to maximize its potential. Each medium holds the power to reveal truths that are as profound as they are personal and awaken an essential part of our souls. As we navigate these days, take a moment to honor the light you bring into the world. Whether through a stroke of color or a cut of cloth, a resonant melody or a single, well-chosen word, creativity in all forms matters. You are lighting a candle in the darkness, creating a flame that has the power to inspire, comfort, and guide. Let the solstice remind us of the ever-turning cycle of light and dark, creation and rest, inspiration and reflection. And may it inspire you to never stop searching and creating, knowing that even the smallest light can transform the vastest dark. Wishing you a blessed holy, a festive holly, and a new year filled with peace, love, and beauty.

When I read the Fortuny email this morning, I felt as if someone must have been looking over my shoulder at a manuscript for a book I hope to publish. Once again, I submitted a book proposal to a publisher on December 15. The Fortuny holiday greeting mirrors my memoir in so many ways. The Prologue of my book, Interior Design Mourning Design, reflects this ponderance. So too does the quote. Sending everyone Love and Light in this beautiful and magical December season.

“The Secret to the Universe can be found in the study of art and design.” That’s what I would once tell my design students. I believe that too. More than that, I know it to be true. Why? Well, that is my story.

Oh, the façade we create in order to open doors!

Earlier in life, I was no more interested in a nursing degree—my Mother’s vicarious desire for my life—than I was pursuing a degree in business; however, I must say that a degree in business did serve me well.  Even went on to get an MBA.  A friend of mine ribbed me that a trained monkey could get an MBA. 

Granted, it always played well to relate to others my degrees and was two years in a PhD program and post-graduate research pertaining to organizational behavior. 

But that was all surface stuff.  It meant little to me.  Had nothing to do with passion.  Did secure me two jobs lasting a total of 22 years in teaching on the college and university levels. 

Oprah is quoted as saying, “It’s up to each of us to get very still and say, ‘’This is who I am.’ No one else defines your life. Only you do.” 

I was many years beyond that PhD program before I ‘got very still.’ Funny thing, I have always had an inner knowing that I was not being true to myself. The struggle between power and passion was nearly my undoing. An idealist such as I never understands power.

Beauty and Order have been my intent and purpose in life for as long as I can remember. Even as a child, I would enter a beautiful space and be consumed with a visceral response to it all.

When I was 5 years old, my Grandpa Nelson acquired a Victorian Era Queen Anne home on Pearl Avenue in Joplin, Missouri, and the first time I walked in, I was awe-struck. Every time I visited, I would walk from room to room to room and memorize every characteristic of that dwelling. His Queen Anne was one of the more unique of this genre; it was a one-story cross gable, quite uncommon.

He purchased the home fully furnished at auction. The owner had passed in old age and her nephew who lived in another state had inherited the Grand Dame. The nephew was not interested in inhabiting this gem; what a boon on my behalf! His aunt had an interior decorator specify the interior furnishings and treatments, and the home had been impeccably maintained. 

My Grandpa was always impeccably groomed, and his homes were always orderly and clean to a fault. Even though he was not wealthy money-wise, he was conscious of putting his best foot forward though not in a pretentious manner.

Across the street was a modern architectural design that encroached on a lot that probably at one time contained another Victorian era design. I seem to recall that the houses once located there had burned sometime in the 1950s. In its place a family built a Frank Lloyd Wright inspired home. The family owned a large lumber enterprise and were a part of the Joplin Country Club set. I befriended their daughters and came to be a guest in and out of this beautiful home many times over three decades.

These were just two of my many early influences into a future foray of design, which ultimately led to my teaching design at a college in Ohio.

Way Leads to Way, and I followed a myriad of clues that life presented to be where I am today. I’m certainly not implying that everything turned out magically delicious—far from it! Sometimes I opted for a clue that was not an optimal path. Some choices were what I thought to be the best options at the time. I discovered that when I misappropriated my intent and purpose of Beauty and Order, I suffered. Ultimately, we each create our own reality whether we want to own it or not. We project and reflect our life.

The larger aspect of this understanding I owe to Julia Cameron, author of The Artist’s Way. Every designer, artist, creative should explore her book for added clarity. Even today I continue to utilize the tools in her book. One of her key tools, Morning Pages. This memoir, Interior Design Mourning Design, comes from my Morning Pages that have poured forth since 2006.

What I have learned? From Doing what you love, Flow is created. Magic happens. And one of my favorite discoveries that I ignored much of my life? Synchronicities and the meanings thereof. 

Follow your heart and your passion. Find it first. Never play the victim should Flow not follow. Be still. Drop down into your heart. Conceptualize. Ask yourself what truly makes your heart soar. Then, move toward it. Otherwise, inertia is our greatest enemy.

This is my story of my love of design. This is a memoir of my faith and belief in someone, his deception and betrayal, coming to know the Truth, and a return to Beauty and Order, a return to Love. Without the great Duality of life, I never would have learned The Secret to the Universe.

Good Design is the Art of Living.

—Kimberly B. Gray, Santa Fe, New Mexico, December 21, 2024. Material is Copyrighted.